2009 is about to sail to an end and 2010 is coming in just a few blinks of an eye... 2009 seemed like a very long year for me... as per Madam Lily Too's prediction, 2009 is a bad luck year... i tried not to agree with all these premonitions, prediction kinds of stuff... to me, everything that has happened to me throughout 2009 has its own hidden meanings and hikmah....
i started this year off with enrolling myself to school to finish off ACCA.. a good thing that is finally initiated after being stalled for so long... along the way, my car was bashed from behind on CNY costing about RM30k to repair... the hidden message that i'm interpreting from the accident was to be patient... patieince has not been a good friend of mine since forever... after the hit, I got really really angry but i couldn't let it out coz i wasn't around my blood family when it happened... eventhough Redza's family is my family now, but it's different... i cannot show my tantrums and fussiness when i'm around them... so, i had to learn to be patient and refrain my anger from bursting out in an instant... (crash course pun tak sempat pegi..)
then, my brother met with an accident where he burnt his face... at that point i realized how much i love my brother despite our strained relationships throughout these years... it's just in my sub-conscious mind and i never realized the existance of the feeling.... Ahamdulillah, he has fully recovered now..
one day before my 28th birthday, i lost my baby... which i only found out that i was pregnant two days earlier... THIS was a major fall back on me... it took a toll on me for quite a while... i was angry and upset with myself even until now... especially when people who do not know keep on asking.... let's not elaborate on that coz i don't think i have the energy...
later, ACCA exams in June... what a battle... i tried my best to get it right this time and finish it once and for all... alhamdulillah, i graduated! i think the table is starting to turn now... and my quest for job searching started... i did a booboo when i declined a job from a good company... leading to making my husband upset and everybody else worry.... but i had faith in me... i know things will start to come around... and i worked really hard towards getting the job that gives me fair rewards, stability and flexibility!
Alhamdulillah again when HP decided to take me in... when i first started my new job, i realized that in that exact week of November was when i supposed to give birth to my baby if the pregnancy went through... wow.. how great God is.. he replaced my sorrow with something i NEEDED more at that time... a job, that is... not something that i WANT..
so, im starting to think more positive about my life and the happenings in 2009... i realize now that Allah has everything planned for me... and i just have to work hard and ask for His forgiveness and blessings... i do pray that He plans for me and Redza to get a baby next year... hehehe...
2010, there's so many things to look out for... like my Mexico trip next month, our house completion and lots more! i am grateful with all His blessings and rahmat and hikmah... Alhamdulillah...
-says goodbye to 2009 and hello to 2010-
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
emo emo emo
emosi tak stabil... that's what happen when i live too long apart from my husband... yes, memang geli... but, only married people know how i feel... isu kali ini, as usual... babies laa.. aduii... bile la sara naquia nak get over this topic?? i seriously don't know... its just when i see more n more friends uploading their baby photos n stuff... makes me feel more sad for me.... of course, i feel happy for them... but seems like nobody feels sad for me... i know my husband is, but he's a man... it's against his biological rules to show emotions of any kind... knowing me, a super expressive person, being married to an extreme opposite who doesn't display any feelings makes me feel alone... alone alone...dah la duduk jauh... waaaaaaaaaaaa!!!
whenever i talk to people around me, semua kata take it slow, rileks, bla bla bla... but i'm just tired of being sympathised... entah, maybe i want someone to cry for me plak ke??? dem, emo emo emo!!!! benci perasaan ini... this makes me feel handicapped... i keep on asking, what's wrong with me and stuff like dat.... but searching for an answer is a very very scary place to go... i surf the net almost every day now to look for an answer, but in the end, the best solution is to "check with your doctor or gynea"
itu belum campur mulut laser beracun masyarakat setempat yg bertanya mcm polis pencen... OMG.. another baby question, i'll end up in Harian Metro front page that says, "GILE MEROYAN" and the news read: seorang wanita dikatakan naik berang apabila ada orang bertanyakan soalan, "bila nak dapat baby" kepadanya... dia dikatakan bertindak gila dengan menampar lalu meng"abugit" orang itu hingga cedera parah....
conclusion: emo tak abis2... bila nak abis?? tatau... kenapa emo?? jangan tanya pls!
-sara yg emo-
whenever i talk to people around me, semua kata take it slow, rileks, bla bla bla... but i'm just tired of being sympathised... entah, maybe i want someone to cry for me plak ke??? dem, emo emo emo!!!! benci perasaan ini... this makes me feel handicapped... i keep on asking, what's wrong with me and stuff like dat.... but searching for an answer is a very very scary place to go... i surf the net almost every day now to look for an answer, but in the end, the best solution is to "check with your doctor or gynea"
itu belum campur mulut laser beracun masyarakat setempat yg bertanya mcm polis pencen... OMG.. another baby question, i'll end up in Harian Metro front page that says, "GILE MEROYAN" and the news read: seorang wanita dikatakan naik berang apabila ada orang bertanyakan soalan, "bila nak dapat baby" kepadanya... dia dikatakan bertindak gila dengan menampar lalu meng"abugit" orang itu hingga cedera parah....
conclusion: emo tak abis2... bila nak abis?? tatau... kenapa emo?? jangan tanya pls!
-sara yg emo-
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Unisel Yg.....
haih... just got back from Sepang to see my dearest baby niece, nur dhiya hana.... she's here for the whole week to stay with her mummy... sampai2 rumah, i saw my lil sis' car kat luar... haa.. adik dah balik, ada kaki nak ajak makan bubur nite circle! ahhaa... stepped into the house, i saw her crying... ini lain tidak, mesti ada hal ni....
i asked her what happened n she just wept her lungs out... k, taknak citer takpe... jap lagi mesti mak aku tanya... sure enough, my mum asked her what's going on.... here goes...
dia kata, 1. yesterday masa exam, her metrik card kena rampas while she was doing her exam by the invigilator... bile dia tanya kenapa rampas, the lecturer said, "sebab rambut awak kaler2" of course adik aku terkejut, sebab dia memang forever n ever kaler rambut, tak penah pun ada orang tegur ke, bagitau dia that coloring her hair is against Unisel rules... sure enough, bila tanya, lecturer tu jawab, "we are implementing this rules in january"
2. hari ni plak, somehow another invigilator ticked my sister off... just because the exam hall doesn't have air-conditioning, dia nak pass comments kat adik aku yg tak berdosa ni.... i think my sister just wanted extra paper for her answer booklet and the lecturer cakap, "answer booklet awak ni layak buat kipas saya je"
that's the story... now the bitching part from me...
1. apsal nak giler kuasa sangat nak tunjuk hebat giler implement benda for next sem masa budak2 tengah amik exam?? tak gheti psychology ke, budak2 dah la tension dgn exam, perlu ke nak menambah lagi tension dengan rules yg BELUM implement??? apsal, nak bodek boss ke, utk naik pangkat jadi Professor Madya???? aku pun tak paham la apsal lecturer pompuan tu giler kuasa... my parents work in UiTM for more than 30 years n this is SOOOOO intolerable tau tak... even bapak aku yg penah jadi invigilator pun agree.... bengong ke apa, nak execute rules yg belum termaktub lagi??? unless la kalau semua students dah well known dengan the rules, like UiTM - girls takleh pakai short sleeves contohnya... kalau pakai short sleeves jugak pegi exam hall memang nahas le... even budak2 ACCA yg amik exam kat center kat luar pun still apply UiTM rules when we go for exam tau.... kenapa aku kata intolerable? satu, sebab budak2 tgh exam... kalau nak rampas masa kelas ke, masa jalan2 kat koridor ke, lain citer... 2. sebab rules tu belum dilaksanakan lagi!!! maknanya it's not well known to the students yet! apa ke bodohnya lecturer ni??? graduate mana ni?? bikin malu je!
2. apa masalah lecturer lelaki tu nak pass comment sedemikian rupa?? masa mula2 start keje dulu tak check dulu ke facility tempat yg sudi amik ko keje ni mcm mana??? kalau rasa diri tu putera lilin tak bole kena panas, jangan la keje kat unisel! keje invigilator adalah duduk dlm hall, bagi exam paper, bagi kertas extra, kutip exam slip, kutip answer booklet n let the students balik bile dah abis... bukan membebel yg bukan2 n keluarkan statement2 y menyakitkan hati sebab hall tu panas takde air-con... yg patut complain adalah students yg kena berperang berfikir jawab soalan dlm keadaan panas from the weather and body heat of how many students....
aku dengar je benda ni, terus naik darah aku... ko siap la monday ni.... tunggu je bapak aku datang... baru ko tau nasib... i know lepas aku tulis ni, sure ramai yg akan kata aku tak reasonable... but man, i always pandang tinggi pada lecturers sebab kawan2 aku pun ramai yg jadi lecturers and pada aku, derang ni adalah manusia yg berpendidikan tinggi, sebab tu derang bole mengajar n mendidik anak bangsa... tapi, kalau perangai sendiri pun mcm hampes, mcm mana aku nak trust orang2 mcm ni mendidik anak2 bangsa kita menjadi bangsa berguna??? aku paham, they might have their own frustrations sometimes... ye la we all semua human... but if u are not strong enough sampai benda kecik pun nak pass comments yg menghiris kalbu, jangan jadi lecturer... aku rasa, orang yg takde positive attitude tak layak jadi lecturer... sebab tu ada lecturer aku yg mcm hampes dulu semua aku komplen and kena pindah within 24 hours... kalau sampai dah diambil tindakan mcm tu pun tak muhasabah diri jugak, then better think again do u cut out to be a lecturer.... as far as i know, my lecturers in UiTM and Sunway College Jb are among the best lecturers... they bring me up when i was down, they give me encouragements, even those who didn't even teach me personally....
this is sad.... kesian adik aku kena melalui exam yg tension.. i can feel her coz i was a student as well kan.... selagi orang2 yg berpendidikan tinggi tapi tak tinggi moral mcm ni wujud kat unisel tu, mmg Uni life is not an enjoyable one la... sorry to say... sian adik aku!
-aku yg hangin-
i asked her what happened n she just wept her lungs out... k, taknak citer takpe... jap lagi mesti mak aku tanya... sure enough, my mum asked her what's going on.... here goes...
dia kata, 1. yesterday masa exam, her metrik card kena rampas while she was doing her exam by the invigilator... bile dia tanya kenapa rampas, the lecturer said, "sebab rambut awak kaler2" of course adik aku terkejut, sebab dia memang forever n ever kaler rambut, tak penah pun ada orang tegur ke, bagitau dia that coloring her hair is against Unisel rules... sure enough, bila tanya, lecturer tu jawab, "we are implementing this rules in january"
2. hari ni plak, somehow another invigilator ticked my sister off... just because the exam hall doesn't have air-conditioning, dia nak pass comments kat adik aku yg tak berdosa ni.... i think my sister just wanted extra paper for her answer booklet and the lecturer cakap, "answer booklet awak ni layak buat kipas saya je"
that's the story... now the bitching part from me...
1. apsal nak giler kuasa sangat nak tunjuk hebat giler implement benda for next sem masa budak2 tengah amik exam?? tak gheti psychology ke, budak2 dah la tension dgn exam, perlu ke nak menambah lagi tension dengan rules yg BELUM implement??? apsal, nak bodek boss ke, utk naik pangkat jadi Professor Madya???? aku pun tak paham la apsal lecturer pompuan tu giler kuasa... my parents work in UiTM for more than 30 years n this is SOOOOO intolerable tau tak... even bapak aku yg penah jadi invigilator pun agree.... bengong ke apa, nak execute rules yg belum termaktub lagi??? unless la kalau semua students dah well known dengan the rules, like UiTM - girls takleh pakai short sleeves contohnya... kalau pakai short sleeves jugak pegi exam hall memang nahas le... even budak2 ACCA yg amik exam kat center kat luar pun still apply UiTM rules when we go for exam tau.... kenapa aku kata intolerable? satu, sebab budak2 tgh exam... kalau nak rampas masa kelas ke, masa jalan2 kat koridor ke, lain citer... 2. sebab rules tu belum dilaksanakan lagi!!! maknanya it's not well known to the students yet! apa ke bodohnya lecturer ni??? graduate mana ni?? bikin malu je!
2. apa masalah lecturer lelaki tu nak pass comment sedemikian rupa?? masa mula2 start keje dulu tak check dulu ke facility tempat yg sudi amik ko keje ni mcm mana??? kalau rasa diri tu putera lilin tak bole kena panas, jangan la keje kat unisel! keje invigilator adalah duduk dlm hall, bagi exam paper, bagi kertas extra, kutip exam slip, kutip answer booklet n let the students balik bile dah abis... bukan membebel yg bukan2 n keluarkan statement2 y menyakitkan hati sebab hall tu panas takde air-con... yg patut complain adalah students yg kena berperang berfikir jawab soalan dlm keadaan panas from the weather and body heat of how many students....
aku dengar je benda ni, terus naik darah aku... ko siap la monday ni.... tunggu je bapak aku datang... baru ko tau nasib... i know lepas aku tulis ni, sure ramai yg akan kata aku tak reasonable... but man, i always pandang tinggi pada lecturers sebab kawan2 aku pun ramai yg jadi lecturers and pada aku, derang ni adalah manusia yg berpendidikan tinggi, sebab tu derang bole mengajar n mendidik anak bangsa... tapi, kalau perangai sendiri pun mcm hampes, mcm mana aku nak trust orang2 mcm ni mendidik anak2 bangsa kita menjadi bangsa berguna??? aku paham, they might have their own frustrations sometimes... ye la we all semua human... but if u are not strong enough sampai benda kecik pun nak pass comments yg menghiris kalbu, jangan jadi lecturer... aku rasa, orang yg takde positive attitude tak layak jadi lecturer... sebab tu ada lecturer aku yg mcm hampes dulu semua aku komplen and kena pindah within 24 hours... kalau sampai dah diambil tindakan mcm tu pun tak muhasabah diri jugak, then better think again do u cut out to be a lecturer.... as far as i know, my lecturers in UiTM and Sunway College Jb are among the best lecturers... they bring me up when i was down, they give me encouragements, even those who didn't even teach me personally....
this is sad.... kesian adik aku kena melalui exam yg tension.. i can feel her coz i was a student as well kan.... selagi orang2 yg berpendidikan tinggi tapi tak tinggi moral mcm ni wujud kat unisel tu, mmg Uni life is not an enjoyable one la... sorry to say... sian adik aku!
-aku yg hangin-
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Putra LRT
haihhh... just came back from a very loooonnnggg day of orientation session in Prince Hotel KL... i decided to hitch a ride from my colleagues coz i don't really know where the hotel is... so, today tumpang orang, tomorrow after dah tau jalan, i can drive on my own! somehow, my friends did not go home straight after the orientation, so i had to take the LRT to taman bahagia from KLCC... well, knowing me, mana la aku ni rajin nak jalan2 jauh2... thank god i found a new friend at the orientation, Ruby who lives in Klang and is taking the same route as i am...
at first Ruby wanted to take the LRT and transit to komuter at KL Sentral, but i managed to persuade her to join me all the way to taman bahagia and then send her to batu 3 komuter... much faster that way... but first, we need to walk from Jalan Conlay to KLCC to take the LRT... malas gile punya pasal, i asked the concierge whether they have a shuttle service to KLCC... (selalunya hotel2 ni ada free or sometimes minimal pay of shuttle service for their guests..) i was absolutely correct, when they say yes they do have such service but the shuttle only leaves at 5.30... that time was already 5.15, so what is another 15 minutes compared to walking??? hehehe...
the shuttle left at 5.30pm and stopped at menara Tan & Tan to pick up some mat salleh (hotel guest) and later sent us to KLCC... masa nak turun tu, mat salleh tu siap wish, "Happy shopping!!" kat we all.... aku pun gelak je and said, "no, we are heading home... hehe"
long story short, Ruby & I finally made it on to the LRT... yes, the time was nearly 6pm.. and u can imagine how packed the LRT is... semua orang dah bau mcm rimau but thank god people around us tak busuk... since we just met at the orientation, banyak la benda nak diborakkan dgn Ruby ni.... sekali dlm tengah borak2 tu, tiba2 we just went silent and.... menyelinaplah suatu bau yg menusuk kalbu maha dahsyat.... sila teka kawan2, bau apakah itu???? yeszaaa... bau gas pemedih hidung yg dikeluarkan tika saat seseorang itu memulas2 perutnya!!!! OMG!!!!
aku terus pening sampai rasa nak muntah, plis! dgn tak tercover2 lagi aku tutup hidung dgn tudung... (nasib baik tudung wangi plis!) maaakkk aaiii... dah berapa hari tak jumpa jamban agaknya orang ni????? dah la LRT tgh pack giler gaban dgn manusia.... bole dia kentut kat situ! sape la malaun tu!! (aku suspect orang belakang aku sebab bau dia direct kena kat aku dulu baru disperse to surrounding radius, sebab lepas aku n Ruby dah beriye2 tutup hidung baru orang depan aku plak tutup hidung) huhuhuhuhu....
haiii... apa la malang nasib... dah la jarang2 naik LRT.. bila naik, kena tembakan gas pemedih hidung plak... mcm nak marah, tapi bukannya kentut ni ada DNA bole check sape punya... macam sian pun ada juga... entah berapa lama la dia tahan kentut dia before dia gagal menahannya lagi.... nasihat saya, lain kali sila la buat pit stop dulu b4 naik kenderaan awam... kot2 apa2 jadi, at least tidak memudaratkan kesihatan orang lain, ye tak? sebab confirm tuan punya kentut tu rasa nikmat giler bau kentut payau dia tu... tapi orang lain?? serious aku konpius... nak marah ke, nak gelak ke, nak nangis.... aduiiii................
-yg teraniaya-
at first Ruby wanted to take the LRT and transit to komuter at KL Sentral, but i managed to persuade her to join me all the way to taman bahagia and then send her to batu 3 komuter... much faster that way... but first, we need to walk from Jalan Conlay to KLCC to take the LRT... malas gile punya pasal, i asked the concierge whether they have a shuttle service to KLCC... (selalunya hotel2 ni ada free or sometimes minimal pay of shuttle service for their guests..) i was absolutely correct, when they say yes they do have such service but the shuttle only leaves at 5.30... that time was already 5.15, so what is another 15 minutes compared to walking??? hehehe...
the shuttle left at 5.30pm and stopped at menara Tan & Tan to pick up some mat salleh (hotel guest) and later sent us to KLCC... masa nak turun tu, mat salleh tu siap wish, "Happy shopping!!" kat we all.... aku pun gelak je and said, "no, we are heading home... hehe"
long story short, Ruby & I finally made it on to the LRT... yes, the time was nearly 6pm.. and u can imagine how packed the LRT is... semua orang dah bau mcm rimau but thank god people around us tak busuk... since we just met at the orientation, banyak la benda nak diborakkan dgn Ruby ni.... sekali dlm tengah borak2 tu, tiba2 we just went silent and.... menyelinaplah suatu bau yg menusuk kalbu maha dahsyat.... sila teka kawan2, bau apakah itu???? yeszaaa... bau gas pemedih hidung yg dikeluarkan tika saat seseorang itu memulas2 perutnya!!!! OMG!!!!
aku terus pening sampai rasa nak muntah, plis! dgn tak tercover2 lagi aku tutup hidung dgn tudung... (nasib baik tudung wangi plis!) maaakkk aaiii... dah berapa hari tak jumpa jamban agaknya orang ni????? dah la LRT tgh pack giler gaban dgn manusia.... bole dia kentut kat situ! sape la malaun tu!! (aku suspect orang belakang aku sebab bau dia direct kena kat aku dulu baru disperse to surrounding radius, sebab lepas aku n Ruby dah beriye2 tutup hidung baru orang depan aku plak tutup hidung) huhuhuhuhu....
haiii... apa la malang nasib... dah la jarang2 naik LRT.. bila naik, kena tembakan gas pemedih hidung plak... mcm nak marah, tapi bukannya kentut ni ada DNA bole check sape punya... macam sian pun ada juga... entah berapa lama la dia tahan kentut dia before dia gagal menahannya lagi.... nasihat saya, lain kali sila la buat pit stop dulu b4 naik kenderaan awam... kot2 apa2 jadi, at least tidak memudaratkan kesihatan orang lain, ye tak? sebab confirm tuan punya kentut tu rasa nikmat giler bau kentut payau dia tu... tapi orang lain?? serious aku konpius... nak marah ke, nak gelak ke, nak nangis.... aduiiii................
-yg teraniaya-
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