memorable 2009...

2009 is about to sail to an end and 2010 is coming in just a few blinks of an eye... 2009 seemed like a very long year for me... as per Madam Lily Too's prediction, 2009 is a bad luck year... i tried not to agree with all these premonitions, prediction kinds of stuff... to me, everything that has happened to me throughout 2009 has its own hidden meanings and hikmah....

i started this year off with enrolling myself to school to finish off ACCA.. a good thing that is finally initiated after being stalled for so long... along the way, my car was bashed from behind on CNY costing about RM30k to repair... the hidden message that i'm interpreting from the accident was to be patient... patieince has not been a good friend of mine since forever... after the hit, I got really really angry but i couldn't let it out coz i wasn't around my blood family when it happened... eventhough Redza's family is my family now, but it's different... i cannot show my tantrums and fussiness when i'm around them... so, i had to learn to be patient and refrain my anger from bursting out in an instant... (crash course pun tak sempat pegi..)

then, my brother met with an accident where he burnt his face... at that point i realized how much i love my brother despite our strained relationships throughout these years... it's just in my sub-conscious mind and i never realized the existance of the feeling.... Ahamdulillah, he has fully recovered now..

one day before my 28th birthday, i lost my baby... which i only found out that i was pregnant two days earlier... THIS was a major fall back on me... it took a toll on me for quite a while... i was angry and upset with myself even until now... especially when people who do not know keep on asking.... let's not elaborate on that coz i don't think i have the energy...

later, ACCA exams in June... what a battle... i tried my best to get it right this time and finish it once and for all... alhamdulillah, i graduated! i think the table is starting to turn now... and my quest for job searching started... i did a booboo when i declined a job from a good company... leading to making my husband upset and everybody else worry.... but i had faith in me... i know things will start to come around... and i worked really hard towards getting the job that gives me fair rewards, stability and flexibility!

Alhamdulillah again when HP decided to take me in... when i first started my new job, i realized that in that exact week of November was when i supposed to give birth to my baby if the pregnancy went through... wow.. how great God is.. he replaced my sorrow with something i NEEDED more at that time... a job, that is... not something that i WANT..

so, im starting to think more positive about my life and the happenings in 2009... i realize now that Allah has everything planned for me... and i just have to work hard and ask for His forgiveness and blessings... i do pray that He plans for me and Redza to get a baby next year... hehehe...

2010, there's so many things to look out for... like my Mexico trip next month, our house completion and lots more! i am grateful with all His blessings and rahmat and hikmah... Alhamdulillah...

-says goodbye to 2009 and hello to 2010-